The Return to Light

Tonight, at 1:08 a.m., I celebrate the longest night of the year (even though I'll likely be asleep). Today is Midwinter's Day--the Winter Solstice. It marks the end of the sun's decent into darkness, and the return to light.

For a girl to whom light is one of the most fundamentally important things ever, the winter solstice means hope. It means that it only gets better from here. It is midwinter's night, and come dawn, I will have survived the longest darkness winter's arsenal can offer.

Of course, the winter solstice has deep significance in pagan cultures. It was the dawning of the "famine months," the January through April quarter of the year during which ancient clans had the greatest chances of dying out. So they celebrated, going out with a bang. On the Winter Solstice, they slaughtered all their animals (so as not to have to feed them through the deep winter, and providing the only large source of fresh meat they'd likely see all year), sought warmth in the wine and beer that was finally fermented enough to drink, lit big fires and partied. I know the word "pagan" scares people, but it doesn't scare me (it really just means any religion outside of the Abrahamic monotheism of Christianity, Judaism, and Islam, and I'm not afraid of people who believe differently than I do).

I think they had the right idea. It's the ultimate light at the end of the tunnel. Every day from here on out is longer than the last. The sun will shine longer tomorrow than today, and still longer a month from now. Light defeats darkness tonight. Can't get any more Christian than that. "The light shines in the darkness and the darkness could not overcome it," right?

I feel more connection, more meaning, in the celebration behind the solstice than I do with Christmas these days. I could easily replace Christmas with winter solstice. Christmas has become empty for me. Seeing baby Jesus in the manger evokes no intense emotion. I am unconvinced that we have any inkling of the when or the where, let alone the what, of Jesus' birth in reality. I am much more inclined to appreciate him at the solstice than in his stress-inducing, Santa-filled birthday. I think there could come a day where I would seek a community that celebrates the solstices with true holiday revelry. They celebrate the same thing, in my mind--the coming of the Light.

I wish you a hope-filled Winter Solstice. May your Midwinter's Night be one of peace, and may you be filled with the knowledge that Light is once again poised to triumph over Dark, and that warmth will rule once more.