The Business of Healthy, Happy Women

Not too long ago, one of my posts gained quite a comment storm. When I wrote it, I had no idea it would spark any reaction at all, let alone fifty-plus passionate comments. Because of that post, I feel the need to place a disclaimer at the beginning of this one: While I welcome your thoughts on any topic, this post is not about abortion.

This post is about women's health--mine, and that of the women you know. I grew up surrounded by health professionals, but up until this week, I neglected mine in a pretty serious way.

On Monday, at the ripe old age of 24, I went to see the gynecologist for the first time. I'd never had any sort of woman-doctoring done--no exams, no tests. My poor mother has been hinting, prodding, and pleading for years now, but I always had excuses: I was having regular periods. I wasn't that old. I wasn't having sex. Everything seemed to be functioning well. I didn't have the money.

The real reason that I wasn't going to the lady-doctor was pure fear. I was scared. I was terrified that I wasn't "normal"--while men have the benefit of comparison in the locker room or at public urinals or in dorm hallways, I don't get much face-time with my own vagina, let alone anyone else's. I was afraid that they would find something terribly wrong with me. I was nervous about cold metal instruments, painful scrapers, a rumor I heard that they do a test involving scissors, any real or imagined odors "down there," and the embarrassment of anyone seeing my thighs that close.

I finally talked myself through my fear and out of my poor excuses because I am smart enough to know they were bad ones. I should have gotten my virginal, regularly-menstruating self to the gyno at the age of 21, like everyone recommends.

So, thanks to the great state of Nebraska, which gave me a good tax return and took away my money excuse, I nervously made an appointment at Planned Parenthood. A friend of mine told me they were cheap, and I liked how informative and professional their website is.

I had never really heard anything good about Planned Parenthood. Most of what I knew involved bomb threats and protests. I assume that there are others, perhaps reading this blog, who are similarly uninformed.

I was so afraid about the visit that I spent the entire week before the appointment nauseated and nervous. I was more anxious than I can remember being in a long time. By the morning of, I was flipping out. I'm still surprised I kept my lunch down. I nearly canceled the appointment; I even promised myself I could do whatever I wanted that night--eat, drink, and be merry, no expense spared.

From the moment I walked through the door, I have never had a better experience with a doctor. The nurses and receptionists were cheerful, kind, and incredibly helpful. When I hesitatingly asked, "Will it, um, be possible for me to see a, um, female doctor?" the receptionist answered that not only was it a completely common and valid question, but they don't even have any male doctors. "You'll see our nurse practitioner," she told me. "She's super nice."

Every person I encountered at Planned Parenthood was exceptionally kind. The paperwork process was easy, including filling out forms to get a discounted rate because of my low-income status. The facility was nice, clean, and well-lit. The nurse and the nurse practitioner each took a long time to actually talk with me. They answered every one of my questions. They told me about their children. They explained to me what they were doing and what each test was for. They advised me well, taking my specific situation into account fully.

And the exam was a cinch. Seriously. Like I said, best doctor's experience ever. It was entirely easy. There was not a moment of pain, discomfort, or even awkwardness. No instruments kept on ice. I got to keep my shirt on. The pelvic exam literally took less than 30 seconds and I didn't feel a thing. I was assured that I'm normal. She told me that, at least until test results come back, I appear to be completely healthy.

Plus, they took over 50% off the cost for me because of my income!

I wish that, sometime in the past several years that I've been too afraid to do this, I'd known my experience didn't have to be terrifying, and could even be positive. I feel in control of my health, I feel calmed that I'm "normal," I feel brave for conquering my fear, I feel smart for taking care of myself. I wish I'd known earlier that it could be this way. I am entirely glad that I did this. I hope that if you or someone you know feels the way I did, this post can help. If you need more details--I know no specifics would have been to graphic if they would have helped me feel more prepared--please e-mail me.

My second motive for writing this post, other than to encourage women not to be afraid to take this sort of step, is to say what a huge fan I now am of Planned Parenthood. However you feel about abortion--that is not all that takes place there. The nurse telling people about birth control was very firm in her instructions, "You must use a second birth control method for at least one month after beginning the pill. I know the internet will tell you one week, and the pharmacies say two weeks, but we insist upon one month. We do not want to see you back here because it didn't work." They aren't in the business of abortions. They are in the business of healthy, happy women, and everything that goes along with them: general healthcare, STD tests, pregnancy tests, birth control, sexual health, reproductive health, and pregnancy care. They even do men's healthcare.

When I came and left Planned Parenthood on Monday, there was a man holding a sign outside that said "If you become pregnant, I pray that you will welcome that new life responsibly." I think that as protesters go, he was a rather nice one to encounter. But I wonder if he knows the great amount of responsibility that is taking place inside the building he is in front of. I wonder if he knows that there are women welcoming life there, whatever his opinion on some of the procedures performed there.

Planned Parenthood is much more than abortions, and definitely not something to be afraid of. Whether he knows or not, now you do.