Big-ish News

The other day in the grocery store I ran into an acquaintance from Union. We exchanged pleasantries--I congratulated him on his engagement, he asked what I was doing after graduation... you know the drill.

Usually I hate that question: "So, you're graduating in May. Then what?" Because usually, the answer is "I have know freaking clue." It's exhausting saying that over and over again. It reminds me of the terror that is the utterly unknown. But this time, for the first time ever, I was able to answer, to provide him and myself with some sort of ground on which to place the question.

"Well, I'm not 100% sure, but I'm hoping to move to Prague and teach English."

Most of you reading this blog probably already knew that, but it'll be news to some.

I started thinking and researching about it a month or so ago. I've kept my mouth shut on this blog because I tend to get brilliant ideas and then get bored with them and give them up. I didn't want to have to eat my words later.

But I want this idea, this process, memorialized even if it doesn't happen. I want to have proof that this was my dream, that I wanted to be this brave, even if I'm really not.

Because honestly, it scares the crap out of me, the idea of moving to a foreign country all by myself. Seriously? Me? Move to a place where I will know not one person on the entire continent? Right.

In order to teach English in Prague, you need a TEFL certification. You can get one through various online schools, but most legitimate employers want you to go through a traditional program (which runs about $2000). The school I'm interested in teaching for, Caledonian School, offers TEFL certification several times a year. If I left two days after graduation, I could make it. They provide housing for the month-long course, and guarantee you a job afterward.

Jobs are a dime a dozen for TEFL-certified teachers in Prague, or so I hear. Housing on the other hand is expensive and hard to find. The school would help me with that too, though. It pays about $1000 a month, and with the cost-of-living being very low in Czech Republic, I think I could swing it.

I really want to do this. My theory is that if I can move to another country, I can do anything. The whole idea both excites and terrifies me. I'd have to make friends from scratch, not knowing a soul. I'd have to find and obtain housing in a new city where I don't speak the language. I'd have to learn the public transportation system, which is excellent in Prague (communism was good for something, apparently). I'd have to start a new career, one for which I didn't attend college for four years. I'd have to teach, which involves quite a lot of time up in front of people. I'd probably need to learn some Czech, though the school gives teachers free Czech lessons and I already have a Pimsleur Czech language course on my computer.

Not to mention that if I'm going to go to Prague, I have to somehow figure out a way to pay to get started, find a place to store all my stuff, manage to fit everything I need to live in two suitcases, and muster up the courage to leave Lincoln.

I don't know if I can do it. I don't know if I'm brave enough. I don't know if I have it in me to be happy there (although I do know that I'd sure better go in summertime, so that by the time fall rolls around I'm settled in and okay).

There is a very large part of me that wants to move to Prague precisely because I'm scared to do it. I don't believe in living a life of fear, remember? I want to face the things that scare me, especially this one, because I want it so badly. I want to live in Europe. I want to take public transportation every day. I want to walk along canals and see ancient buildings on a daily basis. I want to learn a new language. I want to be completely and utterly independent. I want to know that every choice I make is the one that I want to make, and not influenced by someone else. I want to live in a place where I can quickly, easily, and cheaply travel through Europe. I want to make friends with someone who doesn't speak the same language that I do. I want to learn how to live simply, with less than I do now. I want to know that America is not the only place to live a beautiful life.

I want to say "I am going to Prague." Right now, provided I can overcome the financial obstacles (which I'm looking into), I think it is entirely likely. I know I may change my mind. I know I might not be able to afford it. I know I could chicken out in the end.

But today, it is my plan. If you ask me what I'm doing in May, I'll tell you, "I'm hoping to move to Prague."

P.S. The deal is sealed. I just read on a blog written by an American living in Prague that Czech women have a thing for dying their hair outrageous red and purple colors. I'm there!